Friday, March 22, 2013

The MRAs Invaded My Blog!

Happy Return-From-Spring-Break everyone!  Tomorrow I will be returning to 30 Days of Buffy but for right now I figured we'd have some extra fun!

So on my last post a comment was posted by a guy who proclaimed he was BOYCOTTING AMERICAN WOMEN because of how awful they are.  I'll invite you to go look at that comment because, hey, no one will ever accuse me of deleting discussion from the opposition!  But he did post a list of "facts" that I'd like to debunk one by one, because a lot of them regard things I would have liked to talk about anyway.

Before anything else I guess I should explain what MRAs are. They are Men's Rights Activists, men who believe that now that women have apparently taken over the world, men must fight back to reclaim their rights.  I would hate to direct you, my wonderful readers, to anything that will really make your head explode.  So I will follow this link (to the bowels of Reddit Hell) with these two fun links.  This one is to the topics page about MRAs.  This one is to an awesome site making fun of MRAs.

Okay, now to the meat of this post. 

1. False rape accusations (it has been proven that up to 80 percent of rape accusations are FALSE)

Oh man, we're really starting off with a doozy!  Remember, he's saying that this is one of the reasons he will never date American women.  Because they all like to lie about rape.  This is especially important to remember after the verdict of the Steubenville rape case came down last Sunday.  Now LET ME TELL YOU HOW NOT TRUE THIS IS.

These statistics are coming from the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network.

Now, those stats may seem irrelevant to this question but let me put them in context.  After attempting to research the actual rate of false reports of rape, many realize there is no actual number.  This is because--as you can see in this depressing infographic--the rate of rapes that are even investigated is so frighteningly low it's hard to know whether or not claims are false.  And while the FBI reports that about 8% of rapes claims are "unfounded", that does not mean the same thing as falsified--it means that not sufficient evidence could be found one way or another.  And, considering how terribly rape is investigated, that is not surprising.  Still, after looking around at a few reputable sources in America, no estimate is even remotely close to 80%.

Now here's why this is misogynistic (as if I have to explain this):  You see that graph up there?  Yeah, guys like this are the reason that graph looks that way.  It assumes that women are all liars and whores, and completely dismisses the experience of rape survivors.  And yes, this is misogynistic--there are male victims of rape but rape is a VERY gendered crime, if not in reality then at least as far as our culture is concerned.  Assuming that every woman who claims she has been raped is constantly lying is a form of victim-blaming, and it's not okay.  But holy shit, 80%.  This guy really doesn't want to be taken seriously!

2. False domestic violence (DV) charges (same as above, and up to 40 percent of domestic violence victims are MALE, with their female partners INITIATING the violence)
 Hey, I saw this one just a couple weeks ago while researching my Domestic Violence post!  On an MRA web site!  Okay, let's break this down, because the way this was written literally makes no sense.

The rate of fake domestic violence charges is (apparently) as high as fake rape charges, thus 80%
Up to 40% of DV victims are male, with their female partners initiating the violence.

Okay.  First of all, THERE ARE A LOT OF MALE VICTIMS OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE.  In fact, many sources corroborate that statistic.  That, in itself, is not misogynistic--women can also be terrible people.  However, there is no indication in any of the many studies I read that those 40% were all assaulted by female partners.  Just as the statistics for women do not take into account their female intimate partners.

But let's throw that all out the window, because this:

According to the U.S. Department of Justice, between 1998 and 2002:
  • Of the almost 3.5 million violent crimes committed against family members, 49% of these were crimes against spouses.
  • 84% of spouse abuse victims were females, and 86% of victims of dating partner abuse at were female.
  • Males were 83% of spouse murderers and 75% of dating partner murderers
 I cannot dispute the claims about false accusations of domestic violence, but I can say that 1 in 4 women are likely to be the victims of domestic violence in their lifetimes and that is another one of the most underreported crimes out there.  So take from that what you will.

 3. False sexual harassment charges
There is no context to this.  The only thing that I can say is that SEXUAL HARASSMENT EXISTS.  Sorry that you can't slap your female coworkers' asses allll daaay loooong these days, dudes, but them's the breaks.  You thinking the ladies are being uptight bitches doesn't make you being gross okay.

4. Financial destruction of men in divorce courts through alimony and support payments (women get up to 95 percent of their ex-husband's income and savings, as well as the house, car, etc)
I'm not going to look up stats for this one because, frankly, I partially agree with it.  Because it's sexist!

Alimony is one of those things that is a gift with a price.  Women receive alimony because men are seen as the breadwinners in married couples' households, thus divorce women are assumed incapable of taking care of themselves.  In a world where women still make less money than men that is not entirely untrue, but it is still objectionable that the default is to give the woman a bunch of money because clearly she is incapable of making it herself.  Child custody is another thing that gets kind of screwed up in the process of being well-meaning.  Women are EXPECTED to take care of their children, so they very frequently end up with full custody.  Which, again, is doing a disservice to both women and men because gender roles exist.  Unfortunately, child support kind of is a different story.

No, you probably shouldn't have to support your spouse after a divorce because of some antiquated notion that they have become reliant on you for income.  However, a child is a whole different story--the parent who does not spend as much time/money with the child is still responsible for its wellbeing, and thus SHOULD contribute to that.  It's not to say that the support-paying parent should be the father, because we're working under the ideal model of the mother not being the default parent.

So, while you're right in theory, Mr. MRA Douche, it's not for the reasons you think.

5. Emotional destruction of men by ex-wives who have stolen their children from them and forbidden the fathers from having custody or contact with their own children
If anyone can actually explain to me that this happens legally I will gladly respond to it.  Until then...WUT?

 6. Divorced dads who commit suicide as a result
There's no number here to prove or disprove so I will say this: this probably does happen.  I read a few articles, and they concluded that divorce and middle age are frequent causes of suicide for men.  However, there are no stats on what is being presented here at all.

-25 percent of American women take psychiatric drugs for mental illnesses. 
This one just pisses me off.  So this is a reason to avoid them?  Anyway, it's bullshit and misleading--about half of the U.S. population will, at some point in their lifetimes, exhibit symptoms that would qualify them for a DSM diagnosis of some kind.  And while women are more likely to be diagnosed with depression (not necessarily BE depressed, but be DIAGNOSED with depression), men are far more likely to have schizophrenia and substance abuse problems.

And it saddens me that any population--women, men, any race, any class--should be "boycotted" because of general statistics about that group's mental health.  Being medicated for mental health issues or even just HAVING them does not make a person bad, or crazy--it's INCREDIBLY common.

-25 percent of women under the age of 30 have at least one STD. 
There are a million reasons for this.  First of all, that rate ain't all that different for men--in fact, one in two adults (regardless of gender) will contract an STD at some point.  Second, us ladies?  We get tested for HPV.  The fellas don't.  Thirdly, it is anatomically easier for women to contract STDs than it is for men.  Also, we are more likely to be screened for STDs than men are.  Since there is no context here (about men vs. women) it's a pretty easy stat to knock down.

-85 percent of divorces in America are INITIATED by women, thus women are responsible for the vast majority of divorces. 

Uhhh, that is a faulty syllogism, dude.  Women being the first person to say "I want a divorce" or being the first ones to fill out legal documents does not mean the divorce is their fault.  It takes two to tango, right?  Like, women aren't all out of the blue saying "I want a divorce!" because they realize every problem in their marriage is their fault.  Also, according to this here paper, about two thirds of initial filings are by women, not 85%.  Still, this shows a lack of personal responsibility.  Divorce really sucks, don't get me wrong, but you have to at least admit that if you're in an equal marriage you both have some fault for "causing" a divorce, right?

-70 percent of criminals in America were raised by single mothers, thus feminism is responsible for most crime in America. 
Two things about this made me laugh:  One, that is an even faultier syllogism than the last one.  And two, when you type "criminals raised by single mothers" into Google, the first results are all headlines about Ann Coulter, Rick Santorum and Mitt Romney planting foot firmly in mouth by blaming single mothers for crime in America.  I'm not going to say anymore about this because this article says it better than I ever could.  Also, feminism does not advocate single motherhood exclusively, just that single motherhood should be an option for women.  So wrong on all counts.

 -The majority of child molestation, child abuse, and child murder in America is done by WOMEN.
"The majority" is a very vague estimation, so let's just go in with the assumption that this guy is talking the bare minimum, meaning 51%.  The APA can go ahead and rule out women committing the majority of sexual abuse right off the bat--according to them, women are the perpetrators in about 14% of cases of sexual abuse in boys and about 6% of sexual abuse in girls.  It is very hard to find statistics on child murder in the U.S., at least child murder stats that are isolated to victims whose parents killed them, so I can't refute that. 

Over 50 percent of American women are single, without a boyfriend or husband; so the fact is most American men no longer want to marry American women. Let these worthless American women grow old living alone with their 10 cats.
I'm not sure how you could know this at any given time, seeing as people are going into and breaking up relationships every day.  According to this handy chart in 2010 over half of women were married, so...I'm not sure how this could be true.  It does not give statistics on whether people have unmarried partners.  Also, it's important to add that men's numbers were higher in the "Never Married" category and lower in the "Married" category.

And Chaz and I intend on having our ten cats together.  And one hedgehog.

This guy wraps up by saying how prejudiced it is when he gets shouted down for telling men to marry East Asian women/.  This fetishization of different cultures because the women within them are stereotypically--not in reality!--subservient is pretty gross.  Marry whomever you want, but if your qualification for marrying them is that they are of a specific race, that's pretty gross, dude.

So in conclusion, you're misogynistic and gross.  I don't think American women--or really any women--enjoy those qualities, so...your boycott may be externally imposed.
Also this:

Back to Buffy later today!  Yay!


  1. NOT TEN!!!!

    I'm drawing a firm limit at 5 cats, 1 hedgehog, 1 dog, and 2 sets of enclosed animals (ya know, hamsters, turtles, birds, fish, etc.).

    But seriously
    1) sexual harassment claims: In 2011 53% of the 11,364 sexual harassment claims filed with the EEOC were dismissed with no reasonable cause. Note that this does not mean that they were false, merely that there wasn't enough evidence to support resolution. Similarly, 63.1% of the 33,956 workplace harassment claims were dismissed. An interesting thing to note, 16.3% of sexual harassment claims were by men. No breakdown as to how many of these claims were the ones dismissed.

    2. Men's reactions following divorce: true, but misleading. Here's an old study, or another one
    I'm not sure that studies published in the early 90s necessarily mean anything though.

    That's all I got folks, just figured I'd fill in some stuff.

    P.S. - Seriously, not ten. For the love of god, not ten.


    Over 50 percent of American women are single, without a boyfriend or husband, so the fact is, MOST MEN DO NOT WANT YOU WORTHLESS AMERICAN WHORES ANYMORE!

    You still have two options though:

    1. become a lesbian


    2. get used to living alone with your ten cats


    As for us American men, we are sick of you and millions of us are marrying foreign women. I married a nice young asian girl, and I would NEVER even think about touching one of you disgusting American women ever again. Asian women are 1000 times better than you, this is why so many American guys are rejecting you and going for asian women.

    Have fun growing old alone with your 10 cats, whore.

    John Rambo

    1. Not boycotting. Enjoying. Quite a lot, actually. And cats are wonderful.

      A real man.

    2. So, are we whores or can we not get men? Also, the percentage of single women is actually closer to 43%. I bet your wife isn't all that impressed with your statistical know how.

    3. What wife? My guess is jerking it since 1992. And really bitter about it.




      Thanks for the laugh, dude.

  3. My guess is that John Rambo is overcompensating for, um, certain deficiencies. It's amusing to laugh at men like him. And believe me, we women do. A lot.